“I wanted more than life could ever grant me.” ~ Today, by The Smashing Pumpkins
Today is the greatest day for me. I’m going to heal.
I remember meeting my first Soul Twin/Twin Flame Angela who was initially my Zen Shiatsu instructor. When I first met her, I was in the middle of the biggest transition in my life, turning myself around to finally swim with the flow of the river in my initial voyage towards being a healer. I was lost and alone, but I knew I was in the right place. When Angela first walked into the classroom, she was larger than life. Small in stature, but her energy body extended past multiple dimensions. She was young and full of fire, and I was drawn to her magnetically. It turns out that she was hurt like me… and just like me, she became a healer out of the very same pain. We both were amazed at each other’s uncanny resemblance to our respective journeys, and it turned out that we were Soul Twins walking in a parallel path all along, finally meeting at a spiritual intersection. It was beautiful and we treated each other like brother and sister. Although distance and time separated us continually… spiritually, we were inseparable. Whenever we finally did meet up, it was like coming home.
She passed away two years ago, and I don’t think I’ve ever gotten over it. I lost my twin. Since Angela died, I’ve progressed so much in the world of healing others, but I don’t think I’ve ever been the same since. Even though she’s always with me in spirit guiding me, I miss her doing so in person.Like I’ve said countless times, the healer/lightworker’s path is a lonely path. It’s arguably a “weirdo’s” path. And sometimes along the way, you’ll find a fellow weirdo and it’s the most amazing feeling in the world. You love them and cherish them, and you want to call them your Soul Sibling or your Soul Twin. But there are also times when you have to move along in your separate ways, and it feels sad because you want them to stay with you forever. But if you’ve cultivated enough compassion for yourself and others, those moments leave you feeling the utmost gratitude that you’ve ever met them in the first place.
As I said in a previous post, I’m grateful to have been alive at the very same time as my most favorite people who ever walked the earth, whom I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting, and calling them my Soul Sibling, Soul Twin, or Wonder Twin 🙂 You’re all some of the greatest miracles I’ve ever experienced.
I’m truly grateful for all the people in my life. I’m truly grateful for everyone whom I’ve ever met. I’m especially grateful for those of you who’ve traveled a parallel path alongside me, saw that I was alone, walked with me for a little while, and then sent me on my way when I was ready. There are so many lessons I’ve learned from all of you, and you’re forever in my heart.
The song “Today” by The Smashing Pumpkins is more of a tragic song, but also a song with a subtle, underlying hope for the future. Someday, with diligent practice of The Way, I’ll be able to truly be at peace with who I am, and to be at peace with my loneliness, sadness, and with all of my spiritual scars. It’ll start with forgiveness, listening, allowing, letting be, and letting go.
One day I’ll be able to look at myself in the mirror and say, “There you are. I’ve missed you.”
That journey starts Today.
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